Preparation Can Help Calm The Mom!

Preparation Can Help Calm The Mom!.

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Preparation Can Help Calm The Mom!

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Is This You?

I was never a list maker or a planner before children. I would usually just go with the flow and whatever happens is what happens. Child number one and two was a breeze when going places or accomplishing tasks but when child three and four came around I thought it was simply impossible to get anything done and going anywhere was a nightmare! So after child number four I found it easier to accomplish daily tasks and outings with the children if I had daily plans off attack!

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Staying in???

When I know that I will be in the house doing chores the kids will help but when I am doing my Mommy duties like laundry, dishes, etc it seemed as if I left the room for five minutes and come back and the room they were in was destroyed! Like little tornadoes…. Of course I would make them clean up their mess but it got so frustrating. Dealing with multiple tornadoes daily where overwhelming and honestly just too time consuming to argue with them to get it cleaned up! So I have a new approach. I have three or four little busy tasks for them to do whether it be coloring, board games, or learning games. That keeps them busy long enough for me to throw in a load of laundry and clean up the dishes etc.  Having little daily tasks and things for the kids to do and accomplish can be fun for them and make your life a whole lot easier. Here are some cool little things that my girls have been doing while on Christmas Break:

  • bracelet making (fishing line, beads, and whatever else you can find laying around the house)
  • coloring a few pictures for family members and putting in envelopes to mail (kids love to mail things)
  • board games for them all to play together (be sure to have the no arguments talk prior)
  • Let them make a scrap book with magazines, glue sticks, a few pictures of themselves, stickers, and craft paper
  • Painting Sun Catchers (you can find these kits for $1 at the dollar store)
  • Making Lunch (Yes children love to cook) Have them make PB&J’s and let them have fun with cookie cutters

For all of these tasks of course not the making lunch I have shoe box rubber maids in the top of my closet and you can store all the materials needed for these in those boxes and that is how I make it exciting for them. They do not know what they will be doing that day. I have all kinds of fun boxes and they never know what they will get! They better be good or they will get no box and time out chair. Make it fun! Make them excited for their busy work during the days.

Heading out???

Oh my… going out with four kids while Daddy is at work and have absolutely no help is the hardest for me. These are the moments when I just need to take a step back and regroup so I don’t loose my mind!

I try to prepare the day before. Outfits laid out all the way down to the matching hair bows and socks!  Do not catch yourself in a hurry and have to go find everyone something to wear. Most Mom’s spend entirely too much time running through the house trying to find matching socks before walking out the door especially when you are on a time crunch.

Back Packs are awesome!!! Get each child backpacks of their own and put their own toys in them. Whatever toys will keep them busy on the road trip, in the doctors office, or where ever you are going. Having their own back pack with their own toys will make them feel special and you can even let them choose what they want to bring.

Snacks are a huge thing for my girls. It seems like they are always HUNGRY!!!! Does not matter if breakfast was fifteen minutes ago. Make sure to pack a snack baggy for each child and throw it in the diaper bag. I try doing healthy snacks like bagged apples, pretzels, carrots, cheese squares, etc. You get the picture. Juice boxes, bottled water, or whatever you choose for their drink option.

I always keep tissue, hand sanitizer, and an extra outfit in the car at all times! You never know when you will need it.

These are just some things that I incorporate and they have been helping me keep some of my sanity. Maybe you can incorporate some of these things and save you a few hairs yourself. When you are a mother sometimes just getting through the day is a huge accomplishment but I have learned the hard way. If you aren’t prepared for your children then they will be prepared for you! You will end up in a bad mood and probably loosing it a few times through out the day! Hope this helps some of you out! Being a Mom is a tough job and even the best preparation and all these things just don’t work! Sometimes you just have those days where things don’t go right no matter how prepared you are for your kiddies!!

Rock On Mommy’s!

My Child has PTSD… Now what?

When I found out my child at seven years of age had PTSD I was in complete shock and honestly had no idea what this was. The trauma that caused this disorder had just been revealed to me after years of her holding it in. (Since she was three years old) So I was already in complete shock and dismay and then for someone to tell me that she suffers from post traumatic stress disorder I just thought I could crawl under a rock somewhere and never be found again. I thought this was a disorder that only soldiers that fight in wars developed… do not ask me why I assumed that…

“She is seven years old… This is not right! This should not be happening.. Why did this happen to my baby girl?”

Of course I wanted to take care of her and see to it that she was given the best treatment out there and I did my research as soon as I heard this news and still continue to research and learn more about children with this disorder and I can now understand my child more and what she is going through thanks to her psychologist, numerous advocacy support groups, books, and the world wide web! I sought medical help immediately!!!

So here is a brief synopsis on what I have learned about PTSD (post traumatic stress disorder) and how I am dealing with it in my child.

Children and teens could have PTSD if they have experienced an event that could have caused them or someone else to be killed or badly hurt. Such events include sexual or physical abuse or other violent crimes. Floods, fires, school, shootings, disasters such as this could also cause this disorder. Other events that could cause PTSD are war, a friend’s suicide, or seeing violence in the area they live.

In the United States alone Child protection services get around three million reports per year. That involves 5.5 million children. This is a sad thing and sadly not many parents are aware of what to do or even who to turn to when these kind of situations take place. Of the reported cases, there is proof of abuse in about 30%. From these cases, they have an idea how often different types of abuse occur:

  • 65% neglect
  • 18% physical abuse
  • 10% sexual abuse
  • 7% psychological (mental) abuse

Also, three to ten million children witness family violence each year. Around 40% to 60% of those cases involve child physical abuse.

I also saw it reported that it is thought that two-thirds of child abuse cases are not reported. 

Just some statistics and information I have stuck in the back of my head since beginning my research. I feel it is time to get in the know and watch what is going on around us so we can help these children in need.

Whether you believe it or not they don’t feel like they have a voice. Most children do not even reveal what has been done to them or how they are feeling immediately. It could take years but the signs are there so we as parents must watch for them.  We have to be the voice for our children and be aware of what to look for. 

How to tell if your child has PTSD really depends on what age your child is. School aged children from 5 to 12 years old may not have flash backs or problems remembering parts of the trauma, the way adults do. Children may or may not put the events of the trauma in the wrong chronological order. They may also think that there were signs that the trauma was going to occur. As a result of this they may think that they will see signs again before another trauma happens. In essence they think that if they pay attention they can prevent it from happening again.

Keep a close eye out on your children s activities with others during play time. A lot of times children with PTSD will keep repeating parts of the trauma. For example if a child witnesses a shooting he may want to play a lot of shooting games when it was not normally a game he would play before. 

Teenagers whom suffer from PTSD are a bit different. They tend to react with the same symptoms of an adult however teens ages 12 to 18 may have a behavioral change and begin acting more aggressively or show lots of hatred and/or anger.

Other things that children and teenagers can go through when suffering from PTSD are fear, worry, sadness, anger towards siblings, family, and friends, feeling alone and apart from others, low self-esteem, and not being able to trust others.

Different behaviors such as aggression, out-of-place sexual behavior, self harm, and drug and alcohol abuse are also signs of PTSD and you should discuss this with your doctor immediately.

 

PTSD can last a few months or years depending on if you get the treatment that is necessary. There are many different treatment options out there and you should seek immediate advice from your physician if you are seeing any of these signs in your child. 

NOW WHAT?

Learn about PTSD and pay attention to how your child is doing. Watch for signs such as sleep problems, anger, and avoidance of certain people or places. Also watch for changes in school performance and problems with friends. Once you have sought professional help and have found a mental health provider that you and your child are comfortable with then you will discuss the options and what is best for your child as far as treatment goes. I will be discussing in later blogs the different treatment options that are used and how it is helpful and how it can make us as parents feel. I had a rough patch wondering if the treatment my child was getting was proper. So I of course did my research on the different techniques that mental health specialist’s use and formed my own opinion on them. Which you too have a right to do as a parent but bare in mind that these professionals are probably just going by what they think is right for you child, you know your child better than anyone so don’t be afraid to speak up and voice your opinion with your child’s therapist and get feedback from them. They will be able to address your concerns and if you feel as if you are not getting the answer’s you need or feel like you need to seek another opinion you have that right as a parent.

What can we do to try and prevent child abuse?

Other thing’s to keep in mind is to make certain you know whom your child is around at all times. We can’t always be with our children that is obvious but you can always have your guard up. You can also go to FamilyWatchdog.com and find out where sexual abusers live in your area.

You also want to provide a safe, caring setting so that children feel able to talk to you about sexual abuse.

Talk to your children about safe touching and unsafe touching. They need to know this. 

Tell the child that if someone tries to touch his or her body in their private areas or do things that make the child feel unsafe, he should say NO to the person. He needs to tell you or a trusted adult about it right away.

Let children know that their bodies are private and that they have the right not to allow others to touch their bodies in an unsafe way.

Let them know that they do not have to do EVERYTHING the babysitter, family member, or group leader tells them to do if they feel it to be inappropriate. 

What should you do if you think your child has been sexually abused?

I will do another blog on this alone because I feel it is important but if you feel as if your child has been sexually abused you need to try to stay calm. If your child tells you that he or she has been abused you need to reassure the child that what happened is not her fault, that you believe her, that you are proud of her for telling you (or another person), and that you are there to keep her safe. Take your child to a mental health and medical professional right away. Many cities have child advocacy centers where a child and her family can get help. These centers interview children and family members in a sensitive, warm place. They can help you report the abuse to legal authorities. They can help you find a medical examiner and therapist skilled in child sexual abuse. DO NOT WAIT! Go immediately and again try and stay calm.

 

Healthy Whole Wheat Pancakes Anyone???

 

 

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I’m all for eating whole wheat versions of things if it makes sense. There are some whole wheat recipes I have tried like whole wheat cookies… Not so so good!!! My girls love pancakes so I tried whole wheat pancakes and well I failed a few recipes but this one is in my recipe book for sure! Be sure to whisk together dry ingredients and then whisk together wet ingredients and then combine them. Also be sure to leave the lumps!! Like most pancake recipes if you stir out the lumps your pancakes will come out tough and chewy instead of fluffy and light! But hey if you and your little ones like tough and chewy by all means get the lumps out! 

 

What You Will Need:

  • 1 cup 2% milk or see Notes below
  • 1 tbsp vinegar* (white wine or apple cider)
  • 1 cup whole wheat flour
  • 2 tsp sugar
  • 1/2 tsp baking powder
  • 1/4 tsp baking soda
  • 1/4 tsp salt
  • 1 egg
  • 2 tbsp melted butter
  • butter for greasing the griddle

Directions:

  1. Combine the milk and vinegar and let the mixture curdle while you mix together the other ingredients.
  2. In a big bowl, whisk to combine the whole wheat flour, sugar, baking powder, baking soda, and salt. Set aside.
  3. In another bowl, whisk together the egg, melted butter, and the curdled milk, until it looks fairly homogenous and smooth. Whisk this wet mixture into the dry ingredients, and stir the two together until just barely mixed. You want any visible loose flour to be stirred in, but there should still be plenty of lumps. If you stir out the lumps, the pancakes will likely be tough.
  4. Preheat a nonstick griddle to 375 degrees F and grease the surface with butter. Add small scoops of pancake batter and use the cookie scooper to gently smooth the scoop into a flatter circle. Cook for a few minutes, until you start to see little bubbles forming on the surface. Flip the pancakes with a turner and cook for a few minutes on the other side, until you peek underneath and see that the bottom is golden brown. Serve with butter and real maple syrup. Enjoy!

Notes

*You can substitute lemon juice for the vinegar, or you can sub buttermilk for the milk + vinegar if that’s what you have. 

*You can also substitute the butter with margarine or other healthy butter subs.

Mission Possible

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Hello. My name is Stephanie Morton and I am a stay at home mother of four beautiful little girls! I am an entrepreneur as well. I love the ability of staying home with my girls and don’t really care too much for the daily chores like laundry, dishes, and house cleaning but it comes with the territory. I am 28 years old and four children… Yes I know, WOW! I am married to an amazing man that I love dearly. He is a wonderful father and supportive husband. I am truly blessed! 

I am now incorporating blogging into my everyday life because I feel like I can offer some insight and helpful hints to many stay at home mommies on how to deal with the everyday “I wanna pull my hair out” moments, I want to share with you all what I am doing with my family and how I am making the days of our lives go by with happiness and health conscious decisions.

 

We need our children to see that they are our most valued treasures. We need to show them that they are our nations future! It is our job to teach them whats right and guide them in the right direction.I will focus on the home and being a mommy but I will also post about 3 things that are very important to me in hopes that it will help others or inspire someone else.

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First and foremost I will be incorporating the lives of Mommy’s! Stay at home moms are my niche because that is what I am so I know the language so to speak, but I would also like to talk about the things working mothers go through as well. This is a parenting blog so honestly whether you stay home with your children or work 40 hours a week, you should benefit either way.

Secondly, I will be discussing on many of my blogs prevention and awareness for children whom have been or are being abused in anyway. I have been in this situation and I have learned so much dealing with this horrific trauma in a child’s life and I hope to help those in need for guidance on what to do in this type situation. I also intend on sharing information on how to acknowledge that this may or may not be happening to children you know or even your own. Like I said, I have had to deal with this traumatic experience in my life and I want to reach out and help others be able to prevent or acknowledge that this is happening by educating you on what I have learned from my personal experience. I am not a doctor. therapist, or licensed counseler and I do not claim to be one but I am a mother and I have been there and dealt with it and have learned so much and still am learning on coping mechanisms, prevention, etc. so I will be sharing what I know with you. 

Last but not least I will be sharing many ideas on how to live a healthy lifestyle and getting your family on the fast track to a health and wellness. I will share recipes that I use for my family, informative information on health and nutrition, and how I get my family the nutrition that they need. Hopefully you too can incorporate these things in your home.

Being inspired by other mothers is what made me want to share with all of you what I am doing in my home so I hope you enjoy my blog and feel free to share with your friends and family if you wish. You can follow me on https://www.facebook.com/stephanie.morton.39 or twitter at https://twitter.com/GetSexy45. Please feel free to comment with any questions you may have or anything you would like to discuss. I love feedback and would absolutely love to hear how I am doing through my visitors! Have a blessed day! Look forward to hearing from you all. 

 

Stephanie Morton~Mommy On A Mission 

Feel free to email me with any questions or if you would just like to talk privately. 

stephsaysitworks@gmail.com

 

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